Poetry News

I'm very pleased to tell you all that I'm about to become a published poet. My poem The Spirit of You has been accepted for publication in an anthology called Healing Words which should be in print by mid December. It's a fund raising anthology for Maggie's Centres UK. I will let you all know when it becomes available and hopefully many of you will purchase a copy to help Maggies Centres to continue their good work. https://www.maggiescentres.org

I go to a creative writing class at Maggie's Centre here in Edinburgh run by Valerie Gilles, the  Edinburgh Makar, (poet laureate) 2005 to 2008, http://www.valeriegillies.com/index.html

Valerie's classes have been brilliant and a true source of inspiration. So thank you Valerie and thank you Maggie's for putting on the classes.

I posted my poem here on 2nd August, but in case you missed it here it is again:

The Spirit of You

Will I ever find you

will we see each other again.t

To hold you again

to feel you beside me

your fingers on my skin.

To become one with you

reach out and find you there

your dark black eyes

looking down on me

one more time

with that sad look you

seemed to keep for me.

To walk along the river bank again

hiding amongst the trees

the birds singing for us

my heart filled with

the joy of you

the spirit of you.

DONALD MACIVER

2015

donald.maciver@gmail.com

I have a new poem ready to go but will leave it for a few days.

Wedding Plans

I notice that there are only twenty two posts on this blog in 2015, which is the lowest total in a year since 2008, when I wrote twenty six posts, so I'm going to have to pull my socks up and do some writing before year end to catch up. Don't know what happened to me in 2008. Maybe I didn't go to Peru that year, or maybe I was just being lazy.

I have a date for my next scan now on 3rd November and then I see Dr McLean on the 12th November. I'm hoping that the tumours have stopped growing, or at least slowed down, and that there are no new tumours anywhere, and maybe we can delay chemotherapy into 2016. If not I'm prepared for whatever comes my way. And remain confident. Well I have to really.

I went to see the Senior Registrar in the oncology department at the Cancer Centre last week and discussed with her the possibility of having mistletoe therapy along with chemotherapy. Having listened to her and thought carefully about things, I have decided against the mistletoe therapy. I may go back to it later, but for now it's off the cards.

I felt quite relieved having taken this decision, as it had been playing on my mind since I went to Glasgow to talk about it.  I still think that there could be good things to be gained from it, but I have to go along with my oncologists advice. She was well aware of the treatment and knew all about it. She had come across it in her posting in Aberdeen and also from her work in Ireland where it's use is more common than here, but of course they don't have an NHS over there. Germany seems to use it in many oncology departments along with other treatments. At least that's what the fellow in Aberdeen told me, though doctor I saw last week seemed doubtful about that.

That's my health news for today. Amongst other news, those of you who have known me for a few years will be delighted to hear that Kieran is getting married to the very beautiful Kerry on the 14th of November, over there in sunny Lanarkshire, where Kerry hails from. The marriage will be at St Chalmers Church, all welcome, and then on to The Popinjay Hotel for the reception. I will travel over on the Friday and stay a couple of nights in the hotel to save me worrying about travel and health situation on the day.

I'm looking forward to the big event.  I'll need to go and buy a new suit for myself. All the men will be in kilts, naturally, but I just couldn't bring myself to wear one. Not after managing all these years without it. Kieran understands and doesn't mind. I hope he comes with me to choose a suit. It might be dark blue, or navy or grey. Suggestions on a postcard please. I will treat myself to a new tie too.

It's hard for me to believe that it's 23 years since we first met, when he was eight years old, and we went to the bFriends base at his school. When we got back to his house June was waiting for us with his mum and with some degree of anxiousness as there was a party in full swing, singing and bevvies etc. Happy days.

Mistletoe Therapy

It's looking as if  I'm going to make it to 2016 after all. This comes as a vey pleasant surprise and not something I had dared plan for until quite recently. So I'm delighted to be here, sitting at my desk with the hot, unexpected autumn sunshine on my back keeping me warm. The joy of it. It means the world to me to be able to enjoy this Indian summer. I wonder why we call it an Indian summer? So I hope you're all out there enjoying and rejoicing. Thinking of which I should probably be out there myself. Though I did have a very pleasant walk around my favourite pond on Wednesday to see my swans and ducks and all the rest of them. They seemed happy and content. Six cygnets have made it through and they're nearly as big as their parents now. Soon be time for them to go, or be chased away by mum and dad.

Speaking of 2016 I might even live to see my team win another Premier League, now that we're top and going strong. Big game on Sunday though so fingers crossed for that folks. Except those of you with an Arsenal bent, which I know some of you do have. But even if we don't win the league I shall be delighted to get to the end of another season. Have you noticed how van Gaal always uses the shall form? Someone should have a word, though I've come to like it now, so maybe don't have a word after all.

Since we last exchanged news I've had another consultation with Dr McLean, my oncologist. We decided not to commence chemo for time being. I've to have yet another scan at the end of October and I will see her on 12 November to view the results and make another decision on chemo. Its a hard decision to make as she tells me there's a third chance it won't make any difference, a third it might slow the growth and a third it might reduce the size of my tumours. I have more or less decided to go for it, but final decision is on hold. I shall decide on 12 November, as the man would say.

I went home to Lewis a couple of weeks back, of which more later. I was having lunch in The Ceilidh Place in Ullapool as I waited for my ferry but I was't feeling very well so couldn't eat it having ordered fish and chips. There was a youngish couple at the table next to me who noticed I had pushed my plate aside and asked me if there was something wrong with it. I explained that it was probably me and nothing wrong with the food, though I'm not certain that was indeed the case. They had something else. Later we got talking and it turns out that he had had cancer too so we had something in common. I don't normally talk to strangers about my cancer but they seemed like an honourable couple and empathetic, so we exchanged views and experiences.

He told me that the best thing that had happened to him, other than the standard NHS treatments, was his referral to the homeopathic hospital in Glasgow, now called  the NHS Centre for Integrative Care.  He spoke very highly of the doctors there and the treatment he received and how it had helped him. So to cut a long story short I decided to contact them to see if they would accept me as a patient. However the NHS in Scotland only pays for homeopathic treatment for Glasgow patients, don't know why they think this is ok. I will ask Sturgeon to explain next time I see her.

The person I spoke to was very helpful and advised me that they would accept me as a patient if I could get funding from an organisation called Safe Haven and to ask my GP for a referral to them. I discussed it with Dr McLean and she was happy for me to go ahead with it and she would give any information they needed re me treatment and diagnosis. My GP was most helpful and within five days had got me the funding from Safe Haven and sent a referral to the hospital in Glasgow.

Yesterday I had my first consultation lasting nearly two hours. They are advising a treatment called Mistletoe Therapy which will need to be administered intravenously. They only do subcutaneous treatment in Glasgow and the only place to get the treatment is in Aberdeen and as NHS Scotland doesn't pay for me as I don't live in Glasgow, I will have to pay myself.

Given that I've been told my cancer is no longer curable I think I will go ahead with the mistletoe therapy. It won't cure me but it could help me cope with chemo and you never know it may reduce the size of my tumour. I won't know for sure what to expect until I have my first consultation in Aberdeen. I've been in touch with them and have the application forms. More later.